Most people think I'm a Little Mary Sunshine, and they are pretty much correct. Every so often, though, events will pile up on me, and suddenly I find myself in a very dark place. Yesterday was one of those days. Back in '76, I had a string of 'em. Remember when Baby Jessica got stuck in that well in Midland, Texas? Well, we were living in Midland at the time, and I had a little boy right about her age, and a little girl who was four. Every time I heard the news reports (and it was pretty hard to avoid them) all I could think was "What if it was one of mine? How could I possibly bear it?" Then I'd find myself spiraling down into that dark place. The only way I could climb out was to seek out my children, remind myself that they were indeed very safe and happy, smother them with lots of hugs and kisses, make them giggle with delight, and tell them how much I loved them.
My kids are all grown up now, but some things never change. Yesterday we first found out that friends had lost a brother to suicide. Just a short time later, we got word that Fiber Woman's son had been in a serious motorcycle accident. And down I went, into that dark place of wondering "What if it was one of mine? How could I possibly survive?" There was only one thing to do, of course. I got on the phone with them, just to hear the sound of their voices, reassured myself that they were happy and safe, and, most importantly, told them how much I loved them. It helped. It helped a lot.
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1 comment:
I like the way you are able to recognize the darkness that is sometimes a part of our lives, see it, feel it, and take some action to help move yourself to a better place. This is a good example of how we can move through the darkness, not be consumed and stuck in it. I applaud you!
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