EVERYTHING WE KNOW ABOUT LOVE, WE LEARNED AT THE MOVIES

I sat facing a woman in a restaurant recently, and it was fairly obvious that she was not a stranger to the plastic surgeon's office. It was also clear that she had spent several hours getting ready for a lunch date with a girlfriend at this very casual cafe. She was a work of art, from her perfectly coiffed head and masterfully applied cosmetics, on through her smart ensemble with just the right accessories, and right down to the professionally painted toes peeking out from those very expensive sandals. In fact, I'd be willing to bet that she is the type who wouldn't even step out onto her porch to retrieve the paper unless she was wearing her full-metal armor.

It got me to thinking, about how a person gets to this point. I mean, I'm all for good grooming, but doesn't this border on obsession, when it becomes the focus of your days, and consumes most of your thoughts and all of your time? Then I started wondering, what might cause a person to need so many props, and I came to the conclusion that if you were raised to believe that good looks were the key to success, then maybe that would leave you wondering "What if this is all I have to offer? Would anyone still care for me if it were to disappear?" Makes me kind of glad I was never a head-turner. In fact, I'm fairly certain I have absolutely nothing in common with John's fantasy woman, so the only conclusion is, it had to be love! Kind of comforting, isn't it, to know that the traits that brought you together are the kind that last forever, and cannot fade or disappear?

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We went to two movies in Houston this weekend. First was The Ugly Truth, and to be perfectly honest, I spent the first hour just getting more and more pissed off. As you probably surmised from the above paragraphs, I really hate the whole notion that women are supposed to spend their lives worrying about how to keep their men aroused 24/7, while men don't feel at all compelled to return the favor! And that business of playing dumb, or pretending to be someone you're not is just insane. Obviously, if you do manage to snag a guy by doing that, you'll end up having to spend the rest of your days acting a part, for fear of losing him if he ever saw the real you.

The movie later redeemed itself though. First by knocking Meg Ryan off her throne with one of the best restaurant scenes ever, then by coming to the same conclusion that was reached in our second movie of the weekend, 500 Days of Summer: the heart doesn't care about all those lists the brain has drawn up, describing the perfect spouse or fantasy lover. It's gonna fall in love with who it falls in love with. (which is why you should be somewhat cautious about who you let it hang around with, avoiding pedophiles and sociopaths if at all possible)

So, basically, I still stand by my all time favorite movie advice to the lovelorn, which came from dear old dad in the movie Juno: find someone who's seen you at your worst, and, God help them, still thinks the sun shines out your ass!