"One of the secrets of a happy life is continuous small treats."-- Iris Murdoch
At the end of his usual morning call the other day, John told me to "Have a good day." My reply to him was "Oh, I will! I'm pretty good at that you know. In fact, I think I've found my "niche" - having good days!" We both had a good yuck over that, but we both knew it was actually true. I do have a gift for having good days, and I have no idea where it came from, since I was raised by people who seemed to excel at having bad ones!
I think one reason my parents weren't happier is that they were looking for something outside themselves to do the trick. They always felt they needed the next big thing - the thing that was just out of reach - and then they would be happy, while I was what John fondly referred to as "a cheap date." All he had to buy me was a Dr. Pepper, and I was as happy as a little clam. Also, people frequently say things to me like "I'm glad you're so easily entertained", because the tiniest things can make me giddy. I wrote about that in my post Euphoria.
Anyway, the longer I live, the more I'm convinced that "stuff" has never made anyone truly happy. The minute the newness wears off, the glow is gone. Then you will be out the door again, searching for the "thing" (or the person, for some) that is going to fix you, and you are never going to find it. Ne-ver, ne-ver, ne-ver!
It is only by going inward, slowing down, clearing away the clutter, staying in the moment and living deliberately, that we are finally able to see and appreciate the tiny miracles - the "continuous small treats" - that abound in our everyday lives. Learn to do this, and you too can become a cheap date - one who gets orgasmic over a musical crescendo or the exciting color combination in a ball of yarn!
P.S. John just called and asked what I was doing. When I told him what I was writing about, he said "Well ultimately, that was probably the most expensive date I've ever been on." "Oh really," I replied. "How so?" "Because it has lasted for nearly 40 years!"