WHAT IF?

I am what most people would call a fairly "chipper" person, but once in a blue moon, I do get down in the dumps -- maybe after finding that our latest deer-proofing scheme was all for nought and all my tomatoes got beheaded, or, very often, after reading the newspaper or the latest update on friend Susan's blog Walking Nature Home, where she has been chronicling their battle with her husband's brain cancer.  That's when I find myself stewing about why some good  people get so much bad stuff heaped onto their plates, while many of the most greedy and corrupt seem to be skating off scot-free.  When I get to thinking about all the greedy and corrupt in our country today, that's when I really get blue, because I can't help but wonder, what ever happened to all the passion and idealism of the 60's?  I thought we were going to end war, and change the world!  How did we grow up to become those people, or raise children who thought that way?

Anyhoo, one day not long ago, when I was pondering such things, it occurred to me that our parents and grandparents were probably just as idealistic and determined when they went off to fight their battles, and every bit as discouraged when they looked back years later, and realized how little had changed.  It got me to thinkin', what if...

What if, we weren't really meant to "fix" the world?  What if it's unfixable?  What if it was set up more as a test, or an obstacle course, and the point is not whether any one generation manages to achieve utopia, but rather how we perform as individuals -- how we deal with whatever comes our way?  That in turn, got me to thinking about my son's videogames.

Yeah, I know, that's a crazy segue, but think about it.  There are millions of stars and planets out there, and who knows how many universes.  What if... our creator made different worlds where he could try out different systems, and some worked out better than others?  Maybe ours -- this "free will" system -- turned out to be more of a beginner level planet, but if you do the best job you can possibly do here,  with handling whatever this "game" throws at you, then perhaps you get to "level up".  If not, you might have to start over at the beginning.  That would make me feel a whole lot better about all those wanker bankers.

Well, as you can see, my mind can run amok and go to some very strange places when I turn it loose to wander, but I kind of liked this one.  I found it somehow comforting, to think that perhaps the world wasn't meant to be fixed, it was just meant to be endured, with as much grace, integrity, gratitude, and appreciation of whatever small blessings come our way, as possible.

"What is clear is this: I'll do a better job of loving him -- and taking care of myself -- if I let that need to control go and accept that I'm not in charge of anything except how I respond to whatever life brings." ~ Susan Tweit, Walking Nature Home