I have been studying the people I come across - who is consistently happy, who is not - and I have come to the conclusion that too many people lead bulimic lives. No, they don't have eating disorders. They live their lives in a bulimic fashion - feast or famine, binge and purge, drought then deluge. They go to jobs they can barely tolerate, day after day, month after month, until they just can't take another day, then they blow a month's salary on a one week escape to paradise, so they can forget about it all. Trouble is, coming back is just such a bitch! Why do they put up with jobs they can barely stand? Because they are making big bucks. Why do they need big bucks? To afford the big escape, the big house, the big whatever. Of course, I am not talking about people who are just barely scraping by. I'm talking about people who actually have choices - people like you and me.
Maybe they do have an eating disorder, but it's not the one you have read about. It's the one where you don't get any real joy from your food. The one where you are always grabbing something on the run, or at your desk, or in front of the TV. Or maybe you think you are too fat, so you go on whatever plan is the current rage, and convince yourself that you can live without chocolate or peanut butter or wine for the rest of your life. You eat nothing but packaged, processed, frozen crap, that's been nuked in the microwave, for weeks on end until one day you just snap. Then you go nuts and eat everything that isn't nailed down, until you've not only gained back all the weight you lost, you've added a few additional pounds as well.
Personally, I prefer a life that has a little more balance to it, and I refuse to deny myself anything that I truly love or need - like chocolate. I have always been a big fan of the eating program that allows you to eat anything you want, as long as you control your portion size and don't go over a certain number of points each day. At first you tend to blow most of your points on junk, and then wonder why you are still so hungry and unsatisfied at the end of the day. Then gradually, you come to realize that if you use your points wisely, you can eat wonderful, satisfying, healthy meals, and still enjoy such treats as wine and peanut butter. No, I will never wear a bikini again (probably shouldn't have even when I was a teen!), but I'm about as healthy as you can get. I'm in my mid-50's now, get plenty of exercise by doing fun stuff that I enjoy, such as gardening or taking long walks in the Hill Country, don't have to take any medications whatsoever, and haven't needed any surgeries since my last baby was born twenty two years ago. I've found a balance I can live with, and I look forward to dinner every night with great enthusiasm, because I know it will be something delicious and satisfying and the happy highlight of my family's day.
We have never been in the habit of taking big vacations every year either, although we could probably afford it if we were careful with our pennies. It's not that I don't like to travel, because I do. It's just that I prefer to enjoy life every single day, and not just one week out of the year. Every day I try to find some balance between doing icky stuff and pleasant stuff. For every item that I manage to cross off of my nasty chore and errand list, I allow myself an equal amount of time doing something from my "fun list". Do a load of laundry, then I can read a chapter from my current novel or mystery book. Mop the floor, then I get to sit down with a cup of chai and the newest decorating magazine that just came in the mail. Run several crummy errands, then reward myself with a trip to the library or garden center. Cook really good meals for my family two or three nights in a row, then we get to go out for dinner, and I don't even have to come up with an excuse. We take several little weekend getaways throughout the year, and when we do take a longer vacation every few years, I don't even mind coming home afterwards, because I'm coming back to a life that doesn't suck!
Maybe they do have an eating disorder, but it's not the one you have read about. It's the one where you don't get any real joy from your food. The one where you are always grabbing something on the run, or at your desk, or in front of the TV. Or maybe you think you are too fat, so you go on whatever plan is the current rage, and convince yourself that you can live without chocolate or peanut butter or wine for the rest of your life. You eat nothing but packaged, processed, frozen crap, that's been nuked in the microwave, for weeks on end until one day you just snap. Then you go nuts and eat everything that isn't nailed down, until you've not only gained back all the weight you lost, you've added a few additional pounds as well.
Personally, I prefer a life that has a little more balance to it, and I refuse to deny myself anything that I truly love or need - like chocolate. I have always been a big fan of the eating program that allows you to eat anything you want, as long as you control your portion size and don't go over a certain number of points each day. At first you tend to blow most of your points on junk, and then wonder why you are still so hungry and unsatisfied at the end of the day. Then gradually, you come to realize that if you use your points wisely, you can eat wonderful, satisfying, healthy meals, and still enjoy such treats as wine and peanut butter. No, I will never wear a bikini again (probably shouldn't have even when I was a teen!), but I'm about as healthy as you can get. I'm in my mid-50's now, get plenty of exercise by doing fun stuff that I enjoy, such as gardening or taking long walks in the Hill Country, don't have to take any medications whatsoever, and haven't needed any surgeries since my last baby was born twenty two years ago. I've found a balance I can live with, and I look forward to dinner every night with great enthusiasm, because I know it will be something delicious and satisfying and the happy highlight of my family's day.
We have never been in the habit of taking big vacations every year either, although we could probably afford it if we were careful with our pennies. It's not that I don't like to travel, because I do. It's just that I prefer to enjoy life every single day, and not just one week out of the year. Every day I try to find some balance between doing icky stuff and pleasant stuff. For every item that I manage to cross off of my nasty chore and errand list, I allow myself an equal amount of time doing something from my "fun list". Do a load of laundry, then I can read a chapter from my current novel or mystery book. Mop the floor, then I get to sit down with a cup of chai and the newest decorating magazine that just came in the mail. Run several crummy errands, then reward myself with a trip to the library or garden center. Cook really good meals for my family two or three nights in a row, then we get to go out for dinner, and I don't even have to come up with an excuse. We take several little weekend getaways throughout the year, and when we do take a longer vacation every few years, I don't even mind coming home afterwards, because I'm coming back to a life that doesn't suck!
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