It came as no surprise that #1 with me was verbal affirmation, with favors and deeds being hot on its heels. Want me to be putty in your hands? Clean a toilet. Grab a dish towel. Take out some trash! What was surprising was the thing at the very bottom of my list, receiving gifts -- especially when you consider what a wonderful gift-giver my hubby is! But, maybe not so surprising if you delve into family history. You see, it's not that I don't like his gifts. It's more that, somewhere back in my childhood, I was taught not to trust them. They aren't always a true indicator of a persons feelings.
We had this one relative, when I was growing up, who was forever being showered with gifts. She always had the biggest pile at Christmas; her gifts were always the most beautifully wrapped; you wouldn't dare not honor her on any of the official Hallmark occasions; and, we wouldn't even consider going anywhere, or doing anything the least bit fun, without bringing her a momento or souvenir. Was it because she was just so adorable we couldn't resist? Nah. I'd say it was more akin to appeasing the gods -- tossing young virgins into the volcano so it won't erupt.
Soooo, alas for poor hubby, though I do appreciate his generosity, I learned this lesson early on: one should always look a gift-horse in the mouth!
P.S. Many thanks to obrag.org for the image above.
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2 comments:
Ahhhh, poor hubby. Well, send those tangible gifts on to me (except for electronic gizmos!)
Chapman's book is a good one about keeping those 'love tanks' filled.
This post and the earlier one opened up such a good topic for discussion.
Share the links and books!
My friend Paula, who is a teacher, said they discussed one in a workshop about better understanding your students, but she couldn't remember the name. It might have been the same one you mentioned.
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